NOEMI SCHLOSSER
STAGE DIRECTOR, PLAYWRIGHT & COACH
THE FOUR SEASONS OF HESTER STREET
A magic realistic tragicomedy musical written in 2021
"Welcome to 1913 New York—where elections are rigged and ice cream wars rule the streets! Gangsters set the prices for assaults, and unions protect them. Join Louie, our American Oliver Twist, as he shows you the Lower East Side like never before!"
THE FOUR SEASONS OF HESTER STREET
is a TRAGICOMIC MUSICAL TALE seen through the eyes of seven-year-old Lepkele (Louie for the friends), a boy growing up in the gritty, whimsical world of the Lower East Side before World War I.
His reality —filled with Jewish gangsters, corrupt politicians, and the harshness of poverty—is beautifully embellished and transformed by his magical realist imagination. Surrounded by colorful characters inspired by historical figures of the local underworld, and unaware of how truly poor his family is, Louie’s world is one of innocent wonder and charm, blending vibrant 5-penny songs and humor in a uniquely American, New York version of “Oliver Twist”, leading to a poignant and unforgettable finale resonating with our modern times.
My grandmother died alone in a nursing home during COVID, and being stuck in Israel, I couldn’t visit or say goodbye. I was confined to a small Tel Aviv apartment with a toddler while my husband worked long hours in the hospital. Whenever my baby napped, I wrote the play I longed to see when "all this" would be over. The pandemic made time feel frozen, so I escaped reality by dividing my musical into the four seasons, each with its own themes and songs, craving change to break the monotony of my daily life and the eternal blue sky through my window. I wanted a musical full of humor and emotion, vibrant characters, and dancers on stage—something to help me lift myself out of the grimness and imagine a (American) “Naye Velt /New World”.
At the same time, I wanted to honor the rich culture of the 5-penny songs that defined the turn of the century, along with the eccentric and little-known Jewish underground history of New York. Most of the storylines are inspired by real events and people of the time, drawn from newspapers, pictures and books like “Jews Without Money” and “How the Other Half Lives”. These songs, often mocking the harshness of tenement life—factories, lice, unions, street gangs, pickpockets, hunger, and even adultery—captured the resilience of those who lived through it. To me, they reflected how a young child, could find meaning in a single blade of grass growing through the pavement. It echoed my own longing for freedom, for air, and for nature during the lockdown.
The show’s ending ties back to the pandemic, revealing that the entire story is a blend of confused memories from a lonely 107-year-old man on his birthday. The final scene shows him, isolated in a wheelchair, waving to his friends and family (the audience) from the window of his nursing home to avoid exposure to the disease.
This play was supported thanks to the generous support of the Schusterman Foundation and the Yiddish Authority Israel.
THE FOUR SEASONS OF HESTER STREET is a four-act play for a big ensemble cast with the option of actors playing multiple parts. This musical play ideally includes dancers and a mixed chorus as well as small or big musical accompaniment, depending on infrastructure.
For a script please contact: dramacoach.noemi@gmail.com
THE FOUR SEASONS OF HESTER STREET
ACT 3, SCENE 14 REPEATERS
SILVER DOLLAR SMITH
So, for the election, do we understand each other Sammy? Whenever they vote with their whiskers on, you take them to a barber and scrape off their chin fringe.
SAMMY THE PIMP tries to interrupt him throughout the monologue
But...
SILVER DOLLAR SMITH
Pssst! Listen. Then you vote them again, with sideburns and mustache. Then to the barber, and off come the sides and you vote them a third time with the mustache alone. If that ain't enough, and the box can stand a few more ballots -and we all know it can stand a few more ballots. Clear off them mustache and vote them plain-face. This makes every one of them good for four votes.
SAMMY THE PIMP
I understand that this works with the Irish, but…
SILVER DOLLAR SMITH
Aaaaaahh! The Irish! We coop them, just like chickens! Always thirsty those damned Paddies. We beat them into a cellar, lock them up, get them drunk to stupefaction, and on election day… On election day they crawl out one right after the other like ants to the election booth to cast their ballots and then we promise them more whiskey and off they crawl again, to the next election booth a few streets further till they pass out and wake up days later in their own shit. Damned Irish! Good repeaters! Great investment!
SAMMY THE PIMP
We only have one issue with the local demographic, Mister Alderman. We are Jews.
SILVER DOLLAR SMITH
What? Jews don't drink?
SAMMY THE PIMP
Jews don't shave!
SILVER DOLLAR SMITH
I need a return on my investment Sammy. I need the Jewish vote.
SAMMY THE PIMP
I understand but...
SILVER DOLLAR SMITH
Sammy, your business with the girls is going well, mmm. Tammany Hall is taking care of you mmm. Sending clients in. Keeping the police out.
SAMMY THE PIMP
Yes, yes. Tammany Hall has been very, very generous.
SILVER DOLLAR SMITH
We wouldn't want rumors going around.
SAMMY THE PIMP
Rumors?
SILVER DOLLAR SMITH
There could be worse things going around…
SAMMY THE PIMP
Worse...
SILVER DOLLAR SMITH
Worse than rumors… yes… Syphilis
SAMMY THE PIMP
No!
SILVER DOLLAR SMITH
Yes!
SAMMY THE PIMP
No!
SILVER DOLLAR SMITH
The pimp needed the politician and now the politician must have the votes.
You must return the favor.
SAMMY THE PIMP
I understand.
SILVER DOLLAR SMITH
Do you?
SAMMY THE PIMP
Mhhmhh
SILVER DOLLAR SMITH
So, how big of a problem do we have Uncle Sammy? How impossible is it for a Jew to shave? Really? I am a Jew. I shave. You get me my votes.
SAMMY THE PIMP
Yes. Yes.
SILVER DOLLAR SMITH
Maybe we could ask them nicely? The poor are the most grateful people in the world.
SAMMY THE PIMP to audience
If people could hire others to die for them, the poor could make a nice living.
SILVER DOLLAR SMITH
Hey you, come here. Waves Blum to come over with a dollar bill in hand.
To Sammy: Like politics, all crime is local.
To Blum: Hi friend, this is your lucky night.
Hands him the dollar bill. Blum takes it and puts it away.
Fancy a drink? A cheese sandwich?
BLUM shaking his hand
Blum. shakes hand Good evening Sir.
SILVER DOLLAR SMITH
Silver Dollar Smith, Alderman of the 8th ward.
BLUM
I know who you are.
Silver Dollar SMITH Knips his fingers and NURSE comes up with a plate of cheese sandwiches. Blum takes one by one and puts them in whatever pocket he has and eats meanwhile as well. NURSE also gives one to LOUIE who is watching from the side. He eats as he watches the scene unfold.
SILVER DOLLAR SMITH
My friend and I are having a discussion. An argument if you will. He swears a Jew will not shave his beard. Do you believe that?
BLUM
Yes!
SILVER DOLLAR SMITH
You are a Jew my friend?
BLUM
Yes!
SILVER DOLLAR SMITH
I am a Jew too! But a shaved Jew!
BLUM
A gangster.
SILVER DOLLAR SMITH
An Alderman… a saloon keeper… a gangster…eh, I dabble... Come on, every Jew is for sale. How much for you to shave it off? How much is God worth on the Lower East Side?
SAMMY
Blum! making clear to Blum not to pursue this
We could also just dress them up, change hats and leave their beards be. You will still get 3 or 4 votes out of each repeater.
BLUM
Too bad your whores can't vote, or Tammany Hall would win 3 to 1. If grandma had a beard she would be grandpa!
SAMMY trying to hint him to stay out and that this is dangerous
A goat has a beard too, and it is still just a goat.
Dr Reinhardt is coming closer with his suitcase. Magic realism sequence is about to take over. This is Louie's imagination going wild again.
DR REINHARDT
Maybe I can solve your problem gentlemen. I was going to retire for the night after a drink and this delicious cheese sandwich, but I could not keep myself from hearing about your predicament. Luckily for you, tonight is your lucky night - you will see with your own eyes- as Mozes saw in the desert the burning bush burn, a miracle!
Let me introduce myself, Dr. Solomon Reinhardt, traveling salesman, scientist, and physician, "a good doctor for a good people". And I happen to have here my traveling sample case filled with elixirs, ointments, tonics, and lineaments: A miracle cure for each ailment, efficacy guaranteed! I just happen to have arrived tonight in town from a long and perilous journey back from ...
BLUM
The Wild West?
DR REINHARDT
Flushing. Where I developed in collaboration with a famous and erudite 100-year-old Jewish Rabbi, not a cream, not a soap but this magical white powder that eats away both the most rebellious and pious of beards, leaving you as clean-shaven as the day of your brit milah, but without the use of scissors, razors or even a blade. I give you... The Kosher Shave!
BLUM SILVER DOLLAR SMITH AND SAMMY THE PIMP
The Kosher Shave!?
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